When you retire from work, you retire from pressure, stress, deadlines, performance reviews, boring meetings, and that annoying guy down the aisle who spends all day making personal phone calls that everyone can hear.
But you will also leave behind something that is more important than you may realize: human contact. While most of your colleagues probably aren’t close personal friends, just being around people provides a certain level of socialization that you will miss once you retire.
A recent study by the University of California at San Francisco revealed that 43% of the people they surveyed who were over 60 years old reported feeling lonely on a regular basis. Two-thirds of the adults who said they were lonely live with a spouse or other partner, which indicates that you shouldn’t rely upon your spouse to be your sole source of companionship.
While you work, social contact happens easily and automatically. After you retire, you can still find plenty of ways to stay socially engaged, but it requires a little more initiative on your part.
Here are seven ways to stay socially active and prevent loneliness after you retire.
Take classes.
Whether it’s an art class, a cooking class, a language class or a salsa dancing class, you are bound to meet other people with similar interests.
Your local community center or library probably offers inexpensive classes covering a wide variety of topics. Your local college may have programs in which seniors can attend classes that have empty seats on a non-credit basis.
Join or organize a club.
A book discussion group, an investment club, a restaurant-of-the-week club, a wine-tasting club or other group based around a common interest will bring people together. Most of these groups will provide mental stimulation as well.
Check the activity calendar at your local community center or use an online tool such as Meetup.com to find an existing group or start one of your own.
Toastmasters clubs provide an excellent venue to meet new people, share your knowledge and experiences with others and become a better speaker.
Volunteer.
One of the best ways to find a sense of purpose and happiness is to help others who are less fortunate.
Volunteering is also a great way to add more culture into your life and meet people at the same time. You can become a docent or tour guide at a museum or an usher at a concert hall, for example. If you have business or teaching skills, you can become a mentor. You can join a local service club such as Lions or Kiwanis.
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This topic is explored in greater depth in my book Smooth Sailing Into Retirement. This book will guide you from your last few months of work through your first year of retirement. It identifies the many ways your life will change and prepares you for the emotions you may experience along the way. You will learn how to design your new day-to-day life in a way that will reflect your passions and interests. You will be inspired to create a new identity for yourself that embodies the way you plan to live in retirement and frees you from the limitations of your former job title.
Join an activity group – or start one.
This could be a hiking group or a group that walks up and down the halls of shopping malls. There are groups that take day trips to local points of interest. A local gym may offer exercise groups for yoga, aerobics, water aerobics, and more that are targeted for seniors.
Join a local chorus or band.
Most communities have local choruses and bands that welcome people of all ages and ability levels. Don’t worry if it’s been years since you have sung or played your instrument. You will be surprised at how quickly your skills return.
Pursuing an artistic endeavor is an excellent way to nourish your creativity as well as providing a way to meet others.
Call, write to, or visit a friend every day.
Today, it is easier than ever to reconnect with friends from all stages of your life using social media tools such as Facebook.
While social media provides a means for initial contact and surface-level interaction, you can cultivate more meaningful connections with people by calling them, writing a personal letter or email or, if they are local, getting together occasionally.
Invite people over.
You don’t have to throw lavish, expensive parties. You can simply invite a few people over for card games or board games, a potluck or a movie night.
Don’t worry if your home is modest or if it’s not spotless from floor to ceiling. People are coming to enjoy spending time with you and the other guests, not to inspect your home.
Loneliness doesn’t have to be a characteristic of your retirement years. With some possibility thinking and a little bit of effort, you can discover or create a variety of physical activities, mentally stimulating activities, and fulfilling activities that involve meaningful interaction with other people.
Please feel welcome to comment below.
Reprinted from my blog on U.S. News – On Retirement.
© 2017 Dave Hughes. All rights reserved.
Photo credits:
Man on bench swing: quinntheislander.
Cooking class: Dave Hughes
Volunteers with red aprons: extremis.
Band concert: 4997826.
Scrabble: Jan. Some rights reserved.
5 Responses
[…] are experiencing a greatly reduced level of human contact. On the other hand, you now have nearly full-time contact with your spouse and family, which can […]
Hi.. I wanted to comment it doesn’t take a whole lot of money to enjoy life IF you retire to a community that has many town events weekly. Being active within those social events, will create friendships where you can spend more time with them by walking early mornings, exercise classes, talking over a cup of coffee together, shopping together, so on and on. And it will give topic for your letters or emails to family or friends from work that you stay in touch with. If you have 3 friends to make a foursome, the options are vast. Like each week one friend has the other 3 to dinner and a board game, cards, charades, spouses included. Schedule day trips once a month to different cities to explore it’s history, and events. Seating for four is never hard to find at a restaurant nor crowded in a car. The idea is not to spend all your time with your spouse after retirement.
Hi DeeDee,
Thanks for your comment! You’re right on all counts. You only need a few quality people in your life, and enjoying time with them doesn’t have to be expensive or complicated.
I think your last sentence is particularly good advice. It’s important that you and your spouse agree upon how much “me time” and “we time” you want have.
Dave it seems to be harder for men to interact after working. I decided to get some girlfriends after relocating as my husband didn’t really want to be social. He would walk in the mornings. Luckily he likes the girls husbands, and they go fishing. He likes going to “their” gym. He was so used to when we came home from work my cooking and cleaning while he kicked back in the recliner watching TV. Saturdays he was always doing the yard or doing little fixer uppers. If I hadn’t of done something, he would be sitting in the recliner waiting for Saturday to come! He sets the table, while I cook, he dries the dishes while I wash, he helps with the laundry, runs the sweeper.. just an amazing change. We have our together things, movie night, college class, joined an art group. We are good schedulers using the monthly calendar.
It is a bad habit to let the spouse do all the work inside the house. My wife was afraid if she died first I would let everything go, and starve to death. I am learning too. It is a partnership. She talked about Gray year divorces, and said most of them was because couples were not on the same page, doing things together. She was fed up with the “mancave” syndrome. Sometimes when she is out with friends, I am insecure about it. I know she needs her space so I do something around the house while she is gone. I do volunteer but am still working full time while she works part time and has more time to socialize. She has the time to check out things for retirement, and we discuss them.